I found it weird that everybody could justify themselves after committing a fault. Just like a child, no, worse than a child, blaming other people for their own mistakes. At first, I didn't want to believe that someone could justify themselves when they are at fault, but the more I observe this life, the more I see these situations.
I found myself experiencing this conditions several times.
Last year, while I was riding my motorcycle in Jakarta, I was going as fast as 120 kph on a straight road. The traffic light in front of me was turning yellow where I am still quite far from the traffic light. I sped up and consequently passed the traffic light just as it turn red. From there, other vehicles from the other way were moving since their light was green. One car sped up after the light turns green, it almost hit me, and I got away from being crushed by the car by a few centimeters. Escaping a near death situation, makes me feel angry to the car which sped up and almost crashed into me, even though it was my fault at the first place who crossed the road when the traffic light was red. I didn't stop swearing the whole day, condemning that car. Nevertheless, after a few days, I realized that it was my fault, and from then onwards I started to think on the word "Justify", it's a word that everybody could use. However, the word "Justify" could mean different from other people's point of view.
With a few more similar situations which I experienced (which are did by/to me) I could conclude that wrongdoers blaming everybody but themselves, human nature in action. We are all like that. What could we do to prevent ourselves from justifying? No one wants to be at fault. This goes the same as criticism, from my point of view, criticism is another way to justify oneself. By criticizing other people, the person who criticizes are looking for a justification of their own fault by pointing other people's mistakes.
Let's realize that criticisms are like homing pigeons. They always return home. Let's realize that the person we are going to correct and condemn will probably justify himself or herself and condemn us in return. Criticism is futile because it puts a person on the defensive and usually makes him strive to justify himself. Criticism is also dangerous, because it wounds a person's precious pride, hurts his sense of importance and arouses resentment.
Just as I was typing this blog, my mom calls me and she gave me some nice words:
Don't criticize them directly; they are just what we would be under similar circumstances. Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain - and most fools do, but it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving. We should talk about our own mistakes before criticizing them, but don't try to over justify yourself.
Sorry for the messy entry, I've just gotta put up what goes in my mind before it's all gone, plus I haven’t had dinner.. XD
And all thanks to mom for the last paragraph (although she won't understand cos it's written in English).....
-Hilario-
Chatboard (0)